Facebook - FarmVille - Freak

So consumed by my pathetic passion for "farming" on Facebook, I have been neglecting to perform the fundamental daily tasks necessary to maintain a modicum of order in my life - sleeping, eating, laundry, blogging, petting my cat, making my bed, showering, changing my underwear (well - I can't dammit - I have nothing clean to put on)! Kudos to me though, I have managed to drag my sorry ass to the office every day - but even when I am there, my mind drifts off to Farmville: to the next harvest, to the next gifts to and from my nephew Gil, to the upcoming holiday season and all the fun accoutrements that will be up for grabs, to the next level and the anticipation of expanding my farm and my horizons. When I do manage to steal an hour or two of sheep-counting sleep, I wake up in a complete funk:

Do my fruit trees need plucking? (damn, I forgot all about my eyebrows)!
Do my cows need milking? (shoot, I forgot to get milk on the way home)!
Do my sheep need shearing? (rats, my wool sweater is dirty)!
Did I fertilze my friends' farms (oh geez - my birth control pills)!
Did I pet my cat before I left? (hell no, not Felix, you idiot - the stray cat that showed up on my farm)!

And so it has been going for the past month. But: "No more", I have said, "I have to get this new addiction under control"! I have implemented (no pun intended) a plan. It started with going to Home Depot yesterday, and purchasing some new plants - yes, real life plants, with real life dollars (well - I used my debit card, but you get the real life gist of it). That's why I was out in the bloody garden at 6.30 am this morning. Pfft - I had forgotten that in real life you can't simply click a button and, hey presto, the land is harvested. Oh no. This was blood, sweat and tears, baby! I did it though - the ploughing, that is. I have yet to plant the damned plants. But I will - at daybreak tomorrow, and I will post the 'before, during and after' pics, just to prove how committed I am to making a radical change in what has become my pathetic little life. Suffice to say, the Farmville picture above is the inspiration for my new planting arrangement.

Enough of this blogging business, I need to go and tend my farm! See y'all tomorrow.